There have been several times over the course of my adult life when I've looked back and thought, "Man, I wish I could talk to myself then to tell myself what it's going to be like now."
I'm sure you know what I mean--the idea of being able to give yourself advice in the past in order to make it easier on the journey to the present is an appealing thought. Of course, part of the "fun" of getting to the present is learning the lessons that God brings us through our trials, but still...I'd like to give my past self a little advice.
Specifically, marriage advice.
I'm lucky to be married to Super-Hubby, so I don't have much to complain about. Like all couples, we have had our rough patches in our 11 and a half years of marriage, but nothing serious. Nothing that is marriage-destroying.
Still, if I could go back in time to the day of my wedding, here's what I'd tell myself:
- Chill. Your personality is dominating and you've got to back off and let him be the man. There can't be two people running the show, and God designed him to be the leader of your household. Let him lead from day one.
- Start talking about your parenting philosophies and ideas now. Don't wait until you become a parent or you'll find little surprises that you weren't prepared for. Like his idea that his children need to be exposed to superheroes and Star Wars from the moment of birth.
- Don't worry about the cat. She's going to die eventually and while everyone will think you are a horrible person for not loving his cat, you'll be able to rejoice in a cat-free home before you know it. (No, I didn't kill the cat. She died of natural causes. Probably an overload of evil.)
- You're not just marrying him, but his entire family too. Do not do not do not do not do not do not allow issues with extended family (on both sides) to become issues in your marriage.
- Pray for him in specific ways throughout each and every day. Don't let one day pass that you haven't blessed the man who loves you in the name of your Savior. Lift him up so that he can fulfill each and every plan God has designed for him, including being a husband and father.
Share with me: If you could go back to your wedding day, what would you tell yourself about marriage, your spouse, and creating your own family?
Jennifer K. Hale is a hopeless romantic living in a Thomas the Train world. Mom of two little boys and expecting a third, she's come to terms with watching Disney princess movies alone. She's married to a middle school teacher and was a high school history teacher herself. Jennifer suffers from a healthy chocolate addiction and she and her family make their home in Georgia. She is a writer of historical and contemporary romantic fiction for the inspirational market and you can connect with her via her blog at www.jenniferkhale.com or on Facebook.
*Hey, Lindsay here again. I'm guest posting about writer's block and brainstorming today over at The Writers Alley. I'd love for you to stop by and say hello!